Mega.
The line was moving slowly because the overly friendly cashier was spending far too much time talking to an old man up ahead in the line:
Cashier: (genuine, radiant smile) Oh, sir. Some of the eggs in that carton are cracked. Would you like to get another one?
Old Man: It's alright.
Cashier: (genuine, radiant smile) Are you sure? We can just get another carton for you right now.
Old Man: It's alright.
Cashier: (genuine, radiant smile) But you don't want to get food poisoning, do you?
You mean the food poisoning I'll get if I don't hurry up and pay for this Mega-Supermarket mega-pack of mega steaks and stick 'em in my freezer? Despite my impatience (Yes, Lord, something I need to work on), as mentioned in a previous post, I am total a sucker for a pretty smile and it wasn't until I moved up in the cashier line that I realized how pretty she was and how her genuine friendliness and care for the cracked egg old man made her even more attractive to me.
I needed an opening to talk to her. Something besides, "Yes, I'll take three paper bags, please." Something cool and snazzy and...QUICK because the line was suddenly moving and I was second in line. Looking around frantically, I saw that the customer in front of me, a girly teenager, only had a few items in her grocery basket, one of which was a CD. The teenager paid for her items and began bagging her purchases. It's go time!
Me: So, is the new Justin Bieber CD a popular sale at Mega-Supermarket?
SmilelyCashier: (genuine, radiant smile) You bet. The girls are crazy for him.
Me: Well, in that case, I'm glad that I was born in my decade.
SmilelyCashier: (laughs) Me too.
I paid for my groceries and walked to my car. It wasn't until I was half way home that I realized I should have asked her out. Why not, right? We had a bit of friendly banter. However, I couldn't just turn around and go back. My Mega-Supermarket mega pack of mega steaks! I needed to get them home. Well, I sped home, put my groceries away, fixed my hair, and then got in the car and drove back to Mega-Supermarket. On the way over there, I offered up a prayer to the Good Lord as well as had a conversation with myself:
Me: Lord, if you want me to ask this girl out, I pray that she'll still there.
Me2: You know, this is rather creepy. Are you sure you want to do this?
Me: Yes, I am aware of that and I am a little nervous about asking out a total stranger.
Me2: She'll probably call security on you. And all the other customers in line will think you're crazy.
Me: Pfft. It's not like I'll ever see them again. Plus, most of the women I know complain that men don't ask them out. So that is what I'm going to do. Now, shut up, because I'm driving!
My shoes squeak from the stickly floor as I walk in. Well, I see that she is still there...except now the store is about to close and most of the last minute shoppers are in line for her. At this point, I considered just going home. I mean, seriously, the line was going to be at least a 30 minute wait and that was assuming no crazy old men wanted to purchase cracked eggs. However, I realized that it wasn't like I had anything to do at home besides get ready for bed. So, I grabbed a few cans of pineapples and got in line. As I waited in line, I considered making sure that I was the last customer so that no one was behind me when I asked SmileyCashier out. Why do I fear so much about what random strangers will think of me? Isn't my self-worth based on Christ alone? This is something I need to pray about.
Before I knew it, it was my turn again! SmilelyCashier sees me:
SmilelyCashier: You again! (Score! She remembers me!) I thought you would have purchased enough groceries. Forget something?
Me: Uh, yeah. Must get pineapples. I forgot pineapples.
SmilelyCashier: Yeah, that happens to me all the time.
Me: Actually, when I got home and put away my Mega-Supermarket mega-pack of mega steaks, I decided to come back and thank you for being such an absolutely lovely cashier.
SmilelyCashier: (pretty smile)
Me: (just noticed her ring finger) Hey...is that an engagement ring?
SmileyCashier: Actually, it's a wedding ring.
Me: Oh, man. That's even worse! (pause) Well, you tell your husband that he is one...lucky...guy.
SmileyCashier: (continues smiling) Thank you so much. I think he needs a reminder every now and again.
Me: Have a good night, SmileyCashier.
SmileyCashier: You too. And thanks for coming back.
And there you have it. Even though she was married, I am glad that I went back. I have no troubles with approaching girls at a party or at swing dancing. However, when it comes to chatting with girls at the bus stop or grocery store or other public places, I freeze up. It's like I need some sort of 'in.' Some sort of way for them to know that I'm not some creep. Why do I have this fear? Where did it come from? Did my parents not hug me enough as a kid?
Here's another lesson that I've since learned from God. Rather than being impatient and annoyed, why didn't I appreciate SmilelyCashier's genuine desire to serve the old man by convincing him to get a carton of crackless eggs? Why couldn't I see that even though she was working at a rather dull and perhaps low paying job, she was doing the best possible job she could? Whether SmileyCashier knew it or not, she was not working for man, but rather for God.
From one perspective, I drove home that night. From another perspective, I actually walked home that night. I was walking on sunshine because I was starting to slowly conquer my fears and resting in God's presence.
